Don't make me feed him goldfish crackers and unleash him on you.

We've lived here for three years now. That means a lot of things, mostly that G and I are dying to move, but also that the kids are due for eligibility reevaluations at their schools. I wasn't on the ball with Motormouth's school, and let them do the re-eval, and they are wanting to change his eligibility from ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorders) to some stupid 'dual' eligibility (because they don't argue that he has Autism, just not enough). That's another story, though, and I won't bore you with it. I called Monkey's school and told his teacher that I wanted to decline the eligibility re-evaluation (they have to be done every three years to determine placement in Special Education, UNLESS the school and the parents agree that there is no need. I can't imagine them deciding that Monkey doesn't have Autism, so I don't want to give them the chance). She called me back after a week and said that it was okay, so I'm assuming that means the school doesn't question his eligibility either, thank God. She then proceeded to tell me that they would still have to do 'some' testing and observations with him to satisfy the MET requirements, yada yada yada. At this point I'm a little suspicious of everything the district is saying, so interrupt her with the following:

Me: I guess I'm okay with you doing what you need to in order to 'check the box' on the paperwork, but I will need you to inform me in advance what days the testing and observations will be done.

Teacher: oh...sure...I guess we can do that, how much notice are you needing?

Me: at least the day before. I feel that if you are going to be observing and testing him, then you should be getting a true look at Monkey without the supports he has in place for his Autism. The main support piece that we provide at home for him is keeping him on his strict GF/CF diet, which as you know, helps him control his behavior, sit still and focus, among other things- and I feel that we would need to take him off his diet for you to really get a feel for what Monkey's special needs REALLY are....you are probably going to want to get everything done in one day. He's going to be a complete mess (shrieking, flailing, hysterical mess) and so I really don't want to subject him to feeling so out of control longer than absolutely necessary. Okay?

Teacher: um...you know....let me talk to the Social Worker. She knows Monkey pretty well, maybe we don't have to do all that....let me find out what we REALLY need to have for this before we jump into testing...*nervous laugh*.

Me: why don't you do that and get back to me.